"A Life of Balance"
Sermon Presented July 18, 2004
(Luke 10:38-42)
For those who have hosted large holiday dinners, you know the planning and work that's involved. Before calling your guests to the table, there are many last minute tasks to perform. Usually a family member or guest will help with these details so that everything comes together for a satisfying meal. The hostess or host seldom relaxes until the dishes are cleared and leftovers placed in the frig. It's difficult to relax and enjoy the food and conversation when the tension of hosting hangs heavy from the ceiling.
That's why I relate to Martha in our text this morning. She's me! I'm her! Of course she can't sit down and visit with Jesus when there's so much work to do. After dinner is over and the dishes are in the dishwasher, then there'll be time to visit! It seems to me that Jesus is too hard on poor Martha.
Let's hear the story as told by Luke in the 10th chapter, verses 38-42. Can't you just hear Martha in the kitchen banging the pots and pans around so that Mary will hear that she's working and needs help? But Mary either doesn't care or she's so engrossed in what Jesus is saying that she doesn't hear her sister. She just sits there engrossed in Jesus' words and when Martha can stand it no longer, she bursts into the room.
Did you notice that Martha doesn't chastise Mary directly but asks Jesus to do it! She knows that a male guest carries more weight than that of a woman - even if that woman is in the unique position of homeowner! She will embarrass Mary in front of Jesus and get the help she desperately needs.
She appeals to Jesus to send Mary to the kitchen where she belongs. A woman's place is in the kitchen and not sitting at the feet of a teacher. But Jesus doesn't come through as Martha hopes! In fact, he sides with Mary inferring that listening to him is more important than fixing dinner.
What words does Jesus use in response to Martha's request? According to Eugene Peterson's translation - The Message he says: "Martha, dear Martha, you're fussing far too much and getting yourself worked up over nothing. One thing only is essential, and Mary has chosen it - it's the main course, and won't be taken from her." Perhaps Peterson's word choice "main course" for "better part" in the NRSV can help us hear this familiar story in a fresh way.
Many of us habitually come away from this text with a sense that we will never get things right. If, like Martha, we work hard, we're labeled "over functioning." If, like Mary, we sit and listen too long, nothing gets done. My instinct would be to snap back at Jesus with the words: "Listen, if I sat around on my duff the way she does, we would never eat - at least not tonight! Don't you know that somebody must trouble herself with those many things or they won't get done?"
However, the tone of Jesus' message is softened some when we think of God's word as "the main course" in the feast of life. Then we don't get the immediate sense that listening is always better than doing. Rather, it places these activities in balance. Jesus urges us to remember that the main course is just that, the main course. Jesus is the host, not Martha or Mary or any of us and he commands us to sit and listen, and to go and do.
For those who were here last Sunday, we looked at the text of the lawyer questioning Jesus on what is necessary to inherit eternal life. Jesus affirmed that he must love God with everything he had and love his neighbor as himself. The parable of the Good Samaritan came in response to a question of who is my neighbor and illustrated the second prong of the directive. This story of Martha and Mary follows on the heels of that parable and illustrates the other command to love God with everything we have. We are supposed to see these two stories together and not separately.
But it's difficult for us to see them in tandem. It's either/or. We understand Martha's predicament well. It isn't just matters of hospitality that distract us; it's the complicated nature of our schedules. Somehow it seems less complicated to plug along and attempt to keep up with our designated tasks than to make changes. For many, worship presents a scheduling problem that interferes with the one day we can sleep in and do nothing. But while rest is important, when we miss worship, we lose the opportunity to rest in God's word - to sit at Jesus' feet for the sake of spiritual refreshment. It's a vital part of the double-pronged joy of listening and doing. It's the main course of a satisfying meal.
In our text, Martha sees that her need is to prepare a great meal for her guest and Mary knows that her need has nothing to do with the kitchen. Jesus sees Mary's response to her need as having eternal value, while Martha's need is temporal. Their needs and priorities are in conflict at this moment.
This brings us to part of Martha's problem. Sometimes we overvalue ourselves in the sense that the world rests on our shoulders and not God's. What if Martha didn't fix dinner -- what would have happened then? What if the dishes don't get washed or the fancy dessert remains a picture in the recipe book? What if?
One evening, while a senior in high school, my older son, D.A., was most upset. He was unloading his accumulate grief when I interjected that I had to leave because I was in charge of a meeting at school and had to unlock the door but we would continue the conversation when I returned. He was devastated that I would leave, and he wasn't home when I returned. I might as well have missed the meeting because my thoughts were on D.A. and not on the business being transacted. How do we understand the difference between real responsibility and responsibility that isn't ours at that moment? How do we understand what are our right priorities and then keep them straight? How do we know when to chuck our assumed responsibility and spend time with God or with people? How do we love God with our entire being? How do we know what is the main course at the time?
Discernment is possible when we keep the two commandments Jesus gave in proper perspective. We must love our neighbors as ourselves and we must love God with everything we have. Jesus doesn't say that we are to become slaves to another person and he doesn't say we are to neglect our family and friends in order to be in church every time the doors are open. That's not love and it's not what God calls us to do or to be!
This story of Martha and Mary illustrates how Martha - and many of us - strive for the things at hand and miss the eternal. It's a picture of how our focus often becomes distorted and our primary need for a deeper relationship with God gets pushed to the back burner in order to tend to the tasks at hand.
After the meal is over, the food digested and the dishes cleaned and put away, there's always more work to do. The kitchen and living room will soon be dirty again. More meals will need to be prepared. But what Mary receives by sitting at the feet of Jesus and listening to his words can't be taken from her. It's hers always. Mary consumed the main course that nourished her soul.
Martha may wonder if Jesus loves her "spiritual" sister better than he loves her. She may suspect that Jesus has little regard for the mundane jobs she performs. But in her complaint about her sister, Jesus recognizes that Martha's labor of love has changed into anger toward her sister. When we begin to ask in our hearts - or even out loud, "Why do I have to do this all by myself?" Jesus steps in and says: "You are worried and distracted by many things. There is need for only one thing."
I believe that churches take on the personality of their leaders and members, and most churches become churches of Marthas and not Marys. We are judgmental toward those who don't do their fair share. We may think - if not say - "Well, if everyone would do their share of the work, I wouldn't have to work so hard" and to a certain extent that's true. However, as individuals and as a church, we usually do the busy things that clamor for attention and neglect the spiritual - those activities that bring us into a closer relationship with God.
If we want to follow Jesus, if we want to embody God's love, there will be times when we have nothing better to do than to sit at Jesus' feet and hear his words. What Martha does is good; it's just not the best thing to do at that time. It's not the "main course." Mary does what is best at that time and in that place. The model for a disciple of Jesus is both Mary (the student) and Martha (the Good Samaritan) rolled up into one.
The challenge is to discern when to sit and listen and when to be busy. The Christian life involves a sense of timing. When Martha gets her life in balance so that she can use her talents of hospitality to further God's Kingdom and still take time to sit at Jesus' feet and learn from him, she will be more whole and God will be better served. Let's aim for balance! Let's pray for balance! Let's resolve to live balanced lives.
BENEDICTION: Go forth to seek a balanced life.
