"Will the Circle Be Unbroken?"
Sermon Presented March 23, 2005
- Holy Wednesday
at United Methodist Church in Whitefish Bay
John 13:21-32
After reading this Holy Week text for the third time, I "heard" in my mind's eye the opening words to an old gospel song - words that go like this: "Will the circle be unbroken, bye and bye Lord, bye and bye." Here Jesus is, eating his final supper with his disciples and the circle begins to break apart. This meal follows the intimate moment when Jesus washes the feet of his disciples. Hear the dinner conversation as presented in John 13:21-32.
Jesus is troubled! He knows that despite his loving care, one of his closest followers will betray him. He's also troubled that another will deny knowing him. He may also know on a gut level that all but one will abandon him at the time of his death. Jesus is like a parent who watches her child led away in handcuffs or buried after committing suicide. "I couldn't teach you enough or love you enough to avoid this heartache." It's a heartbreaking time for Jesus.
But Jesus knew - as we know - that we can't live life for another. We can't manipulate another to do our will. We can't avoid a catastrophe by offering perfect love. We must allow those we love to make their own choices.
This last meal together impacts the inner circle of disciples. Jesus' death is imminent and he knows that physically, he will soon leave the circle. Then he tells them that one of them will betray him. With that announcement, the questions arise. Who is it? Why?
When we look at this group of followers, we see that none of them is very admirable. None is confident that he's not the one being referred to. None is a model for us to emulate in times of crisis - and all of them give us hope for our own future. What are the problems within this group?
First, they aren't confident enough of their relationship with Jesus that they're willing to ask the burning questions. Peter enlists John - the one they recognize as the beloved of Jesus - as the spokesperson for the group. Let John ask him! We often allow our questions to go unanswered rather than to appear to have little faith or little knowledge. Our questions remain unspoken!
Another problem I see is that one of the followers is singled out as "the one Jesus loves." That follower refers to himself as such, but the others accept that designation too. Can a circle be healthy when one in the group is set above the others for acceptability?
Another thing that strikes me is that no one piped up with a denial. No one was sure that Jesus was referring to another. Part of the problem is that we don't know ourselves very well and we don't spend time in introspection to learn about our dark side so as to make corrections. Will we be faithful in a time of crisis? We aren't willing to commit - or we do commit, and then fail the test.
Sometimes accusations and blame break up a group. It must be the fault of another. Again, we fail to look at ourselves. Sometimes we look at the departure of a group member with relief. Surely that person is a weak link or the source of trouble within the circle. Sometimes intimacy pulls us too close to one another and we withdraw because they know us too well. A side effect is that the remainder of the group feels guilty, wondering what they should have done differently. Judas leaves the group and goes out into the night - into the darkness - and the others don't know why.
This isn't a story about heroes! Judas is the rule and not the exception. None of the disciples is guilt-free. Their hope is that Jesus will keep his word and that he won't lose any that God gave him. All need forgiveness. All need to be on guard because we're never as pure or as faithful or as strong as we believe ourselves to be.
Judas left the circle, betrayed Jesus, repented and then committed suicide. He chose his actions and paid a great price. However, when a circle is broken, the one who leaves isn't the only one to suffer. Those who are left experience feelings of guilt. Those who are left miss the fellowship of the one who left. Nothing is ever the same. When Judas left, the disciples chose Matthias to take his place so that the number would again be twelve. The gap was filled, but it wasn't the same.
When families, churches, clubs, or military squadrons experience the loss of someone in the circle there is grief. Sometimes the one leaving is disruptive and can't be helped by the group. There is strength in numbers and in intimacy and in honest interaction. There is strength in having Jesus as part of our circle.
Our circles are fluid. A person can choose to leave the family, but the genetic roots will remain. People choose to leave churches and others fill the gap. We move in and out of relationships as we struggle between comfort and discomfort - faith and doubt - good and evil. Thank God we aren't damned when we make bad choices or none of us would face a hopeful future. However, when we realize that we have made a mistake, we need to reassess our decision and our life. Walking away permanently isn't always the right choice. Sometimes we need to swallow our pride and come back to the circle and seek to be readmitted.
When you seem to be without hope, you can always come back to Jesus - to the circle - and be welcomed with loving arms. All of Jesus' followers except John and a few women left the circle when Jesus was crucified. They weren't anywhere to be found. Yet 120 people returned to pray before Pentecost. Judas was so grief stricken that he couldn't return and he committed suicide.
There's room in God's circle for everyone - the weak, the coward, the fearful, the betrayer. There's room for us! God's circle embraces those who aren't heroes. So "Let the Circle Be Unbroken."
